"We've been unschooling so far - but now I want to start introducing some things to my child."

I hear some version of the above comment rather frequently - which leads me to think that many perceive unschooling, or child-led learning, as an unnatural way-of-life in which parents sit around, virtually on their hands, waiting to see what their children will take the initiative to learn about next.

In contrast, I think the distinguishing factor that makes child-led learning what it is, is the total freedom of the child to choose whether, and to what extent, he wants to learn something, or participate in something.

It therefore has nothing to do with who initially introduces a subject, or even whether - gasp! - a textbook, workbook, or even a "boxed curriculum" is used for some things, and everything to do with whether the child is free, and knows he's free, to decide whether to go along with a suggested activity, or reject it, or even try it out for a while, walking away at any time that he's no longer interested.

(By freedom, I mean freedom not just from blatant coercion, but also from parental expressions of disappointment or concern that the child is ruining his life, from nagging, and from any other guilt/anxiety-inducing behaviors on the part of the parent.

Related note: those of us who endeavor to practice unschooling need to be patient with ourselves: the word "practice" allows us the freedom to not always get it right every time. If we realize we've been, say, nagging, it's time to just apologize and resolve to do better next time! )

In unschooling theory as I see it, a parent who finds that her child loves some structured educational activities, needn't worry that her child is no longer directing his own learning if she buys some "schoolish"- looking stuff in response to her child's delight in this sort of thing.

In my own unschooling journey, I'm finding that it's hard to keep track of how, or by whom, various interests were initially introduced in my family. For instance, a toddler may see Mommy washing dishes and pull up a chair to help.

Then Mommy may notice that her child loves playing with and pouring the water (she probably already noticed this in the bathtub), and in the interest of giving her child even more of what he loves, she may provide a wading-pool or bin of water, along with various containers, for her child to play with outside in the yard.

While playing with the water outdoors, the child may notice how water turns the surrounding dirt into squishy mud, and develop a new interest in working with and learning about the properties of dirt and mud. Mom may then provide a spoon or shovel to facilitate the child's efforts to scoop up and move the mud from container to container, and place to place.

This new interest may flow into a love of manipulating and sculpting the mud into various shapes and creations. The mother may think it's relevant to share that in some cultures, the people build their houses with mud, and she may also talk about clay pottery. Mom might even find related pictures on the internet or books from the library. And/or take the child to a pottery shop, and even talk about the possibility of pottery/sculpting classes.

The child may become intrigued and want to go further with some or all of this information, or the child may just want to keep doing what he's been doing. And of course, as Mom observes her child and keeps looking into various ideas that might delight her child, she may discover some things that pique her own interest - and as Mom follows her own delight, her child will likely get exposure to things that spark new interests in him: it's a never-ending circle.

As long as the parent's totally comfortable with the child going whichever direction he wants to go with his own interests - and hasn't, say, become attached to the idea of her child becoming the next Michelangelo, or constructing an entire playhouse out of mud-bricks in the yard, there need be no worry that parental involvement in the form of giving information and suggestions, is going to rob a child of the chance to direct his own education.